Quiet Your Lizard Brain and People Will Flock to You
“Do you even care about this company? It seems like you’re not even trying!”
Just as the words spilled out, Antonio already regretted saying them. He was getting surprisingly comfortable with lashing out at his employees — and that was now bothering him.
The weight of his words and frustration dejected his long-time employee. Antonio’s coarse comment was a sign that his stress was boiling over.
Antonio is the CEO of a successful tech startup. He has worked his way up from the bottom and is proud of all he has accomplished. However, the pressure of running a successful company was taking its toll on him.
He found himself feeling stressed and anxious all the time, and his Lizard Brain was starting to take over. That’s the part of the brain that roars at you when you feel highly emotional or stressed.
Whenever Antonio felt stressed, his Lizard Brain would kick in and cause him to become defensive and verbally aggressive when communicating with those around him.
He would lash out at employees, even over minor issues like he did this time. He even lost his temper at a client recently during a meeting.
As a result, Antonio’s team was now afraid to approach him with problems or concerns.
They knew that if they brought anything up, they risked setting off his Lizard Brain. This was causing a serious breakdown in communication within the company, and productivity was suffering as a result.
And it wasn’t just his professional life that was being affected.
Antonio’s wife, Sharon, had noticed the change in him as well. He was more irritable at home, and their conversations often turned into arguments. She knew that the stress of running the company was taking a toll on him, but she didn’t know how to help.
One day, Antonio received a wake-up call.
One of his best employees — someone he had worked with for years — quit unexpectedly. When Antonio tried to talk to her about it, she explained that she couldn’t handle the constant stress and negativity in the workplace.
She felt like Antonio didn’t care about his employees and was only focused on the bottom line.
This hit Antonio hard. He realized that his behavior was causing serious damage to the company he had worked so hard to build.
He also knew he needed to get his Lizard Brain under control if he wanted to save his business.
Your Lizard Brain controls your animal instincts. Usually it’s hungry, scared, selfish and horny.
It’s responsible for your most basic needs like breathing, heart rate, body temperature, and hunger. It’s also the part of the brain that controls your emotions — particularly fear and anxiety. And it controls your sex drive.
It’s that primitive part of your brain that’s responsible for your fight or flight response.
It’s the reason you jump when you hear a sudden noise or feel threatened in any way. It’s basically the scaredy-cat part of your brain.
Well — “scaredy-cat” is not a good look for a leader.
The Lizard Brain will cause you to become defensive or aggressive when communicating with others. It can make you feel like you’re under attack even when you’re not.
That’s where your problems could begin to intensify.
So you need to find ways to quiet your Lizard Brain. Calming that part of your brain will make you a stronger leader and being calm, cool and collected will make people flock to you.
You need to train your brain to recognize when your Lizard Brain is taking over and actively work to quiet it down. It’s not easy, but it’s definitely worth it. You’ve got this!
When you quiet your Lizard Brain, it will have tremendous benefits for you:
- Better decision-making: The Lizard Brain is responsible for you fight or flight response — which can cause you to make quick and emotional decisions. By quieting your Lizard Brain, you can make more thoughtful and rational decisions.
- Improved communication skills: The Lizard Brain can cause you to become defensive or aggressive when communicating with others. By learning to quiet your Lizard Brain, you can become a more effective communicator, listening to and empathize with others while conveying your own ideas more clearly.
- Increased emotional intelligence: By learning to quiet you Lizard Brain, you can become more in tune with you own emotions and those of others. This increased emotional intelligence can lead you to stronger relationships with employees and other stakeholders.
- Greater resilience: Your Lizard Brain can cause you to react negatively to challenges or setbacks. By learning to quiet your Lizard Brain, you can become more resilient in the face of adversity — bouncing back more quickly from setbacks and adapting more easily to change.
- Enhanced creativity: Your Lizard Brain can hinder your creativity by causing you to focus on avoiding risk rather than exploring new ideas. By quieting your Lizard Brain, you can tap into your creative potential, generating new ideas and approaches that can benefit your team or organization.
When you quiet your Lizard Brain, you’ll find that you’re able to deepen your connections both personally and professionally. You’ll be more in tune with the needs and concerns of others, which will make it easier to collaborate and work together towards a common goal.
And let’s be real — being a powerful leader is all about collaboration and teamwork. You can’t do it all on your own. So, by quieting your Lizard Brain and improving your communication skills, you’ll be setting yourself up for success.
You can develop mind-body regulation skills — like breathing, mindfulness, meditation, and many more — to quiet your rabble-rousing Lizard Brain.
And you can learn to communicate more effectively by boosting your active listening, empathy, compassion. You need to communicate without defensiveness or aggression.
I worked with Antonio and helped him identify his stress triggers and develop strategies for managing his stress.
We also started on actively work on improving his communication skills. He began to listen more to his employees, empathize with their concerns, and communicate his own ideas more clearly and calmly.
Over time, Antonio’s behavior began to change. His team noticed that he was more approachable and open to feedback. They felt like they could communicate with him without fear of setting off his Lizard Brain.
This led to a more positive and productive work environment, and the company began to thrive once again.
Sharon also noticed a change in him. Antonio was more relaxed and present at home — and their conversations were no longer filled with arguments. She was proud of the progress he’s made and knows that he’s a better leader as a result.
Antonio learned that quieting his Lizard Brain was not only good for his own well-being, but for the well-being of those around him.
He realized that being a powerful leader means being able to communicate effectively and empathize with others. And by doing so, he’s able to build a stronger and more successful company.
